Solo travel tip #3 - Space to Dream
Have you ever felt burdened with the need to be practical?
To keep your dreams doable?
To follow “best practices?”
To do the things others say lead to success?
This can keep us in a box for a really long time. It can make us feel afraid to believe in and go after big dreams because … well …
What if I can’t make them happen?
What if they’re too big?
Or unrealistic?
Or I’m just f**n crazy?
Those fears don’t actually mean you don’t still have big dreams, do they? Your dreams likely have never left. Maybe you’ve just ignored or downplayed them.
For about the first 40 years of my life, this is exactly what I did. And only recently have I begun to feel unshackled by all these long-held beliefs. Only recently have I felt brave enough to verbalize them. And I’m still working on believing in them.
What changed?
Well, other than some good therapy, I can look back and see that travel was a major catalyst.
Travel is one of the things that helped me dream again.
Why?
Getting out of my comfort zone and into a new context offered a unique space to open my mind to possibility. Being in a new location encourages—sometimes even forces—me to be more creative and open.
And honestly, whenever I've taken the time to travel (near or far) in a purposeful way, I’ve found that it opens wide the doors for wisdom to enter ... and to speak directly into my soul.
I believe this can happen for you too.
About a year ago, I read “The Book of Longings” by Sue Monk Kidd, and a quote by one of its main characters, Ana, has stuck out to me ever since:
“Bless the largeness inside of me, no matter how I fear it.”
- Ana, The Book of Longings
Largeness = your particular genius.
Largeness = something that burns in your soul.
Largeness = a longing you may have never acknowledged or told anyone about.
Largeness = a dream that you want more than anything, but fear it at the same time.
Travel—if we allow it—offers us the space to name our “largeness” and the courage to step into it.
Travel—if we allow it—offers the space to name our “largeness” and the courage to step into it.
A personal example:
In February 2020, I traveled to South Africa.
I almost didn’t make the trip because I was worried about the expense and the time away from work. I was traveling solo to a place I’d never been, and I had a long year and wasn’t sure I was up to it. I nearly talked myself out of it, but my sister (God bless her) intervened.
“You need to get away. This is an amazing opportunity and you know travel always refreshes you. Just go and enjoy yourself.”
So I did. And it was the trip of a lifetime.
I met and drank wine and talked politics with people from around the world. I had the best gin & tonic I’ve ever had and experienced a true South African braai (barbecue) with new friends I’d serendipitously met a year earlier in Kosovo.
I met and drank wine and talked politics with people from around the world.
I had the best gin & tonic I’ve ever had and experienced a true South African braai (barbecue) with new friends I’d serendipitously met a year earlier in Kosovo.
South Africa was the place that challenged me to begin to consider my own “largeness.”
—> What were my dreams, really?
—> Why had I not pursued them?
And since we all know what happened around March 2020, you know exactly why I’m especially glad I went on this trip. This was the last time I’ve hopped on a plane and traveled across the ocean.
South Africa was the place that challenged me to begin to consider my own “largeness.”
What were my dreams, really?
And why had I not pursued them?
Walking along the water, mesmerized by the waves that always somehow find a way to speak directly to my soul, I found the courage to consider dreaming again.
I stopped asking, “What do I have to do (also insert “supposed to do”)?” and I began asking, “What do I GET to do? What’s possible for me?”
That was the beginning of the seed of the work I’m doing now. It was the beginning of me finally admitting to myself that I wanted something different. That I wanted to help women like me who were struggling to find their place. Women who didn’t know exactly what was next for them, but they did know, “It’s NOT THIS.”
I wanted to at least try to allow myself to dream big. I wanted to be Brave enough to try.
South Africa gave me permission to DREAM again.
>> I wonder what special place is waiting to help you dream big?
>> What might it say to your soul?
>> What seeds will it plant?
I wonder the same for my next trip.
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